My daddy is a pimp

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My daddy is a pimp

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My Daddy Is A Pimp Video

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And I've been lightly dozing. I pimp him out as the reason I watch Oprah. Once I told another mom that I think Oprah is a great role model for Frank actually true and lawd knows there are few black people in this monochrome town I live in.

But mostly I want to sit with my coffee, and see the ladies that went from gastric bypass to promiscuity and raging alcoholism, and if Frank thinks "Opwah" is his trailblazing black TV auntie, well, so be it.

I pimp him out as the excuse for being a bit behind on the news. How can I understand the crisis in Chad when my life-force is sucked out of me by my 'spirited' 3 year old?

If anyone gives me grief, I just say "you're not valuing my woman-work. I pimp him out to listen to shockingly bad music I secretly love, and we're not talking ironic love either.

The playlist includes "Strike it Up", by Blackbox from the late 80's, and, even worse, Ambrosia. When it's actually Mom with the bladder control problem.

Daddy points out that I'm pimping Frank right now by writing about pimping him. I endeavor not to use the phrase 'meta' recklessly, but I do indeed think this would be meta-pimping.

I just asked Daddy if he was OK with me writing about this utter debasement of our beloved child, and he said "of course. Who do think I am?

Ginger Baker centre with fellow band members, he referred to his daughter as 'jailbait'. I was going out with my parents underage drinking.

When I left school at 15, the best idea in the world was to live for today. Dad and I were into the polo and partying. I was wearing a bikini with bottoms that had tie sides and a redheaded bloke called Marcus thought it would be a good laugh to untie them.

You can't legislate for that. It's human nature, but power and fame is a ticket to do a few more things than most people can.

I told those stories because I thought they were funny. I was not traumatised. Today, Nettie is single with a year-old daughter, Zara.

She has not had a relationship for three years. I've realised other people don't approach relationships the way I do. I overreact. I don't take them calmly so I'm much happier not having a relationship.

She is also happier not seeing her year-old father, who lives on a state pension in a rented house in Canterbury with his year-old fourth wife, Zimbabwean Kudzai, whom he met on the internet.

He was once voted the man least likely to survive the Sixties, and Ginger Baker has undergone a heart bypass, is virtually deaf and suffers from degenerative osteoarthritis, inhaling morphine daily to numb the pain.

Nettie hasn't so much as had a telephone conversation with him in two-and-a-half years. He is also estranged from her younger sister Leda, 50, and brother, Kofi, It was to do with me helping him and her not wanting me to help him.

My sister has tried to have a conversation with him, but he can't hear what you say on the telephone any more and his wife reads all his emails.

Nettie with Ginger and his late ex-wife Liz, Nettie's mother, on holiday in Acapulco in He'd just phone you up 9, times a day, saying: 'Help, can you get me money.

What's happening with this or that? She stops. Nettie laughs but it's hard to join in. Following a brief marriage to the father of her daughter, Nettie has had one meaningful relationship in her life, with a former manager for K-Tel Records.

He was called Tony and was 'a great guy who looked like [Magnum actor] Tom Selleck'. They met when Nettie, then 36, was raising her six-year-old daughter alone and rented a farm together in Windsor where they kept horses.

He died of a brain haemorrhage aged 51 when they were on their way out to a Christmas lunch. Nettie Baker aged approximately 14, around a year before she was first prize in a pool game.

They turned him off on Boxing Day. The nurses were following me down the corridor saying: 'That's it. They said: 'Are you OK?

Your life's changed. If I thought screaming, crying, lying on the floor would have brought him back, I'd have done it. But it won't so you've just got to get on.

It's: 'Ding dong, let's see what I've got to do next. Again, she pauses. That's life and I've had a great life. I've really had some amazing experiences and seen things that most people wouldn't believe.

Born in , six years before her father began laying down the hypnotic beat for such hippie anthems as I Feel Free and Sunshine Of Your Love, with Eric Clapton and Jack Bruce in their band Cream, her parents' marriage was a brutal, violent thing.

Dad thought that was very exciting and sexy so home life was very, very difficult from a young age. I had to share a bedroom with them until I was seven.

The arguing was so bad I used to wet my bed. They never came. They said: 'We don't do domestics. That was over Number Two [she means his very young second wife, Sarah, who was the sister of one of Nettie's boyfriends].

Dad was besotted with her. Before that, my mother would often put up with him seeing other women. She told him when he had a year-old polo groom, 'You can have both of us' or something like that.

When I was naughty, he would take his rings off and it would be pants down and I'd get what I would call the Daddy Smack. My parents were 21 when they had me.

I think I related to them on a younger person's level. When I was hanging around with Dad in the polo time, people would think I was his girlfriend.

We just thought it was funny. I'd enjoy getting invitations addressed to 'Ginger and his daughter'. Mum would get really annoyed about it. Those polo years began in the mid-Seventies when Ginger's pockets bulged with cash from Cream's 15 million record sales and tours and a chart-topping album with his subsequent band Blind Faith.

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